Episode 120: Two kinds of uncertainty

Aili Kuutan: Life always has some level of uncertainty. But what happens when you create uncertainty for yourself? This episode is about two types of uncertainty and how they impact your relationship with life.

Aili Kuutan: You're listening to pure light, where we explore how you can believe in yourself and be happy with who you are. My name is Aili. I'm a coach, writer and yoga and meditation teacher. This is episode 120.

Aili Kuutan: Uncertainty has been top of mind lately. Before the pandemic started, I had a couple of episodes where I talked about the moment that you face uncertainty and how you can either embrace it and go directly into it, or you can run away from it. And then the pandemic started and the entire world was basically thrown into a time of massive uncertainty, where it was totally unclear how we were going to function and move forward. And now, even though things are starting to slowly open up again and move forward in some ways, there's still a lot of uncertainty about what the future holds, because nobody really knows what the new normal is going to be or how things are going to unfold, and that is always true.

Aili Kuutan: Uncertainty is inherently part of life. It isn't something that we can somehow avoid if we try really hard. You never really know what the future holds, and right now, we all have a heightened awareness of that because what we used to consider normal life is no longer available to us. No matter how hard you try, you can't take the uncertainty out of life. There will always be things beyond your control. No matter how much you try to seek security and certainty, there will always be unexpected things that come up, which brings me to the two types of uncertainty.

Aili Kuutan: One is the stuff that you can't control: stuff like the global pandemic or an accident or some unexpected event. And I want to point out that this type of uncertainty isn't always bad. It could be something like you run into someone that you haven't seen in 20 years, and then you meet for coffee, and discover something in common, or fall in love, or something like that.

Aili Kuutan: And then the other kind of uncertainty – the second type – it's one that you do have control over because it's the kind that you create for yourself. It's intentionally choosing to step into the unknown, to embrace uncertainty instead of running away from it. It involves some kind of risk where failure is a possibility. Things may not turn out the way that you hope they do, which means that it's putting you into a place of being vulnerable, so this would include things like starting a business or writing a book or starting a podcast, or even saying, "I love you" first. It means: doing something that scares you; stepping outside your comfort zone; going after those crazy dreams of yours instead of overthinking and then talking yourself out of them.

Aili Kuutan: Tony Robbins has said: "The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can comfortably deal with."

Aili Kuutan: I want to build on that because I think it depends a bit on the type of uncertainty that we're talking about. If you're just handling the uncertainty that life throws at you, you still have a passive relationship with life because you're waiting for things to come at you rather than going towards them yourself.

Aili Kuutan: But if you're actively creating uncertainty by intentionally choosing to embrace it and to face it, that will really increase your quality of life because it puts you in the driver's seat. It means that you are the driving force in your life, so life isn't happening to you, you're the one creating it. So your relationship with life isn't passive, it's proactive.

Aili Kuutan: You aren't waiting for things to happen. You aren't just getting by. You're taking responsibility for moving your life forward, and for doing the things that excite you and make you happy to be alive. You're deciding what you want and choosing to go after it, choosing to make it happen – the things that bring you meaning and fulfillment – and even more than that, you're choosing to grow.

Aili Kuutan: You're actively pushing the edge of your comfort zone, which means that you're in the process of becoming the next evolution of yourself. So there's a willingness to be there in that discomfort and feel whatever comes up with that and face it and work through it and move forward. Instead of choosing the safety and security of what you already know, you're taking risks.

Aili Kuutan: You're choosing your path and creating space for your growth and expansion – space, where you're vulnerable and you're open to the infinite possibilities of the universe. That's where you can experience the magic and wonder of life because you aren't trying to control everything and make safe choices. You give yourself permission to try new things, to take risks, to expand and to surrender to the flow of life.

Aili Kuutan: There's so much in life that's beyond our control. You can't choose how much uncertainty life gives you, but you can choose how much you create for yourself.

Aili Kuutan: When you only allow yourself to make safe choices, it's a way of trying to create security and a way of trying to avoid uncertainty, even though the truth is you can't ever avoid it, and even though it's more fun when you create it for yourself.

Aili Kuutan: If you've been listening to this podcast for awhile, you'll know that I've been working on a book, and over the last couple years, I've been in various stages of embracing uncertainty and facing it and writing, and at other times I've been avoiding. And I recently decided to join a group, a mastermind, to get some support with us to see this through, so I'm curious to see what comes out of this and who knows? Maybe it will be my book. Maybe it will be something else. But either way, I will be choosing to face it and to practice moving forward and into that uncertainty.

Aili Kuutan: When you embrace uncertainty, when you intentionally create it for yourself, you choose courage over comfort and you create the opportunity to experience the thrill of the ride.

Aili Kuutan: Thanks so much for listening. Until next time, may you be guided by your light.